Espresso Beast Blend
The Goblin's weekday shot. Bold, short, unforgiving.
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Coffee made us monsters.
A tiny universe of highly caffeinated personalities — comics, rituals, and characters for people who consider coffee a personality trait.
Welcome to Coffee Monsters
Illustrated collection for coffee and monster enthusiasts. Original 666 Coffee Monsters, born from our love for coffee and a touch of mischief. Comics, characters, and everyday caffeine disasters — no wallet required.
Latest comic
Kettle diplomacy
A dawn kitchen, a slow kettle, and a hostage negotiation with a mug.
Mini comic
Do not.
Both paws. No notes.
We can be people now.
Meet the monsters
Directory →
Bean Sweater · #1
Espresso Goblin
“Talk to me after the crema settles.”
Caffeine 9/10
Mute Until Mocha · #25
Pre-Coffee Beast
“…”
Caffeine 2/10
21:30 Club · #12
Midnight Maximalist
“Sleep is a rumor started by tea people.”
Caffeine 10/10
Latte Perfectionist · #42
Foam Fennec
“If the foam sighs, start over.”
Caffeine 6/10
Remote Forever · #55
Café Squatter
“This is my office. The rent is one well-timed pastry.”
Caffeine 5/10
The 21:30 Promise · #7
One More
“One more and then I am a functional adult.”
Caffeine 8/10
The Travelling Bar · #77
Kit Carrier
“I packed light. Only 2.4 kilograms of coffee.”
Caffeine 7/10
Third-Wave Middle Management · #88
Office Snob
“That is not coffee. That is a beige incident.”
Caffeine 7/10
Short strip
The 21:47 amendment
Last one. I mean it.
The night is still a beverage.
Okay but this one is actually last.
Latest stories
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Coffee problem The laminated note
A shared kitchen, a pod machine treated as a crime scene, and a note that will not save anyone.
Coffee ritual Foam trial
Microfoam is a moral position. Ferns are a heartbreak. Hearts are a retry.
Tiny story Outlet politics
The last wall outlet is not infrastructure. It is a lease.
Tiny story The corner table is a lease
An illustrated short about the remote worker who never went home.
Mini comic The 21:47 amendment
The 21:30 cup is a promise. The 21:47 cup is a constitutional amendment.
Coffee ritual Security theatre
A hand grinder in a security tray is a musical instrument. Obviously.
Latest articles
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6 minA tiny history of coffee personalities
Goblins, snobs, phantoms, and the sink they will never agree on.
6 minCaffeine half-life for monsters
Five hours, give or take a bakery that will never open.
4 minThe last cup that never is
Optimistic to a medical degree. Home never arrives. The coffee does.
On the projector
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0:06 
First sip
Steam lifts, the Espresso Goblin blinks, and the tiny cup finally travels those last few millimetres.
0:06 One last coffee
Streetlights stay friendly while the Midnight Maximalist breathes and the espresso refuses to be last.
0:06 Heart pour
A perfect heart holds still in the cup as café air ruffles Foam Fennec’s fur.
100 tiny disasters
Quizzes you will send to group chats
The kettle picks a kitchen at random. Nine questions. One insult. Office pods, 21:47 amendments, oat politics.
Start a random quiz“Sleep is a rumor started by tea people.”
— Midnight Maximalist
More comics
Mini comic Kettle diplomacy
A dawn kitchen, a slow kettle, and a hostage negotiation with a mug.
Coffee problem The laminated note
A shared kitchen, a pod machine treated as a crime scene, and a note that will not save anyone.
Coffee ritual Foam trial
Microfoam is a moral position. Ferns are a heartbreak. Hearts are a retry.
Tiny story Outlet politics
The last wall outlet is not infrastructure. It is a lease.
Partner beans
The Espresso Goblin’s setup
Affiliate tiles, not a warehouse. If a monster would actually use it, it can sit next to a story.
Midnight Monster Dark Roast
For the 21:30 club. Roasted until the streetlights look friendly.
See shop →Chaos Colombian
Bright enough to start a fourth mug you will not finish.
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